Picking on Thornton is Easy When He Sucks

First a discalimer:

Joe Thornton is 2 completely different players. When the surf is up, or whatever turns his crank he is "JOE THORNTON MOTHERFUCKER!". When he is sad or lonley or whatever turns that bitches crank he is "joey thornton, please read the note my mom pinned to my coat".

His actual full name is Joseph Eric Thornton, so from now on, when I talk about the guy who can change a game and make everyone around him look better I will talk about Joe "motherfucker" Thornton, but when I talk about the guy who started the season with the Bruins last year and BLEW or the guy that did ZERO for San Jose in the playoffs last year I will talk about "Eric Thornton".

Trust me, I will never write about Joe ever again, whinny bitch, I will only write about Fucking ERIC THORNTON the bitch who likes haircuts and beads more than hockey. A guy who capitained an original six franchise, but couldn't get motivated until he was traded to the beach and the best roller hockey team in the NRHA...Oh I'm sorry there is an actual NHL team in San Jose now? I didn't realize. Well that makes sense, no Winnipeg, no Quebec, no Hartford, but San Jose has a team. Great, perfect thanks NHL fucking bastards.

So how is Eric doing in San Jose? I never could bring myself to write anything but FUCK and SHIt when describing Eric's first season in San Jose. He won the Hart Trophy. FUCK. A guy who played like shit for one third of a full season. A guy who abandoned the team he captained long before the trade won the Hart trophy. SHIT. Jagr (who I fucking hate byt the way) deserved the trophy and giving it to Eric is exactly what is wrong with the NHL today.

That said, how is he doing this year? We aren't quite at the famous 23 game mark that Eric reached before beign dumped by the Bruins last year, but he has played 15 games, so we should be able to see something.

Boy can we. ERIC IS IN THE HOUSE!

It took the HART and ART ROSS trophy winner 12 games to score his first goal, and after 15 games he has 2 goals. He is currently shooting the lights out at 6%. That is great in sledge hockey, not to good in the NHL. He has an incredible 18 points, well below his awful start in Boston last year and 12 of his 18 points have come on the powerplay. I am never impressed with powerplay points, you need them, but you cannot rely on them. Of course that was old NHL, before making scoring as easy as possible was the only rule that mattered. So Thornton has 2 goals, 6 even strength points, a 6% shooting percentage in his first 15 games. Oh yeah, and he is minus 5. Now do we see why the Bruins dumped his ass?

"Hey man, the guy still has 18 points in 15 games, better than a point a game and he is on pace for 100 again."

My response - Sure he is asshole, but the guy makes franchise player money and contributes like a third line winger. He is on pace for a 100 points, all powerplay with 11 fucking goals, and he is not a physical presence and his points, as usual, are in most cases meaningless contributions to losses or blowouts.

Some recent examples. How about minus 1, no points in a 2-1 loss, or zero points 3 shots in a 2-1 loss, or better still zero points, minus 3 in a 3-1 loss. The best part of these three examples are that they all happened in the last ten games and they were all HOME GAMES. The fans in San Jose got to see the best that their $7 million man had to offer.

So everytime I think of the trade, I get happier and happier. Chara (Thornton's salary replacement) is playing 30 minutes a game and has 3 goals for 8 points and new "Thornton" Savard has 15 points in 11 games and just watching them you can see that once they gel as a unit, they will be much better than last year, thanks to players who want to play and a leader (who I hate by the way) that the team respects.