Lonely old maid

A lonely old maid got married recently, much to the displeasure of her many cats.

To make matters worse, she is now pregnant. The cats? Well they will be put to sleep of course.

For too long the old maid's ardent stance against marriage made her look sad and pathetic "why would I want a man tying me down and ruining everything? I've got girls night at Puzzels, lady's ringette at the rink, the Bachelor on Friday nights and Sens games with my mom", but now there is nothing sadder and more pathetic than an old maid that has finally landed a man. "Fuck everything that ever mattered to me in my life. Fuck my Saturday night date with my mom. Fuck over analyising the health and well being of my cats. I have a man now and despite our sad little life, it is way better than playing dressup with you Mr. Puss, and especially you Madame Boots." Loneliness makes for great companions.

Good Luck to all of the Aunt Selma's of the world